Saturday, February 19, 2011

Saturday Centus: After the Silence

Ms. Jenny's prompt this week is from the Bruno Mars song, "Grenade". My 100 word prose is wrapped around the prompt, bolded and highlighted in green, below. Please feel free to critique in your comments below...how else am I going to learn? Enjoy.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once upon
this life of mine
there was his promise.
Promises of love,
of hope spoken
in soft gentle voice,
of dreams yet to be fulfilled.
I laughed through tears
when he burst out in song
and sang sweetly to me,
“I’d even catch a grenade for ya!”
I believed him.
Reality set in.
The silence is deafening.
Soundless shouts erupt
from my heart,
loudly, clearly.
I listen to inner truth.
Wisdom gained
through epiphany
that no one,
not even him,
can catch that grenade
while wandering through
personal minefields
battling demons of their own.
My first step towards healing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jenny Matlock

26 comments:

Cherie said...

Very nice and very thought provoking - it makes you want to look inward.

Brian Miller said...

ok, i love that song...and a great write...walking through the minefield yeah..not a lot of fun at times but has to be done...

Bookie said...

This is very probing. I wish I could write with your depth!

Fay's Too said...

Brilliant and razor sharp. I related to that.

Judie said...

Polly, even your prose is a poem. I adore you!!!

Nonna Beach said...

Awesome take on the prompt...battling inner demons...very insightful !!!

The Constant Complainer said...

Polly, I'm a first-time visitor to your site from Cleveland. I clicked-through from the "Deckside Thoughts" blog and read a few of your posts.

I liked your bio other than being a Carolina Panther fan. LOL. But you can just as easily make fun of me - I'm a Steelers fan living in Cleveland.

Anyway, I enjoyed your blog and wanted to comment. Thanks.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

This is incredibly deep. I'm so impressed with your being able to use that prompt in such a beautiful poem. It's just great.
xoRobyn

Poetic Justice said...

Love it love it love it! So impressing that you used poetry for this challenging prompt. Nicely done.
Michelle

Pearl said...

Introspective.

I love how everyone's interpreted this differently.

Pearl

Joanna Jenkins said...

I'm with Pearl-- Love you poem and the comments too.
Very nice job,
xo jj

Sue said...

Great job on this one, Polly. And the message is 100% true.

=)

June Freaking Cleaver said...

Healing those scars is the hard part - when you start to realize that the grenade catcher is juggling his own ammo.

Great job on this!

Anna said...

Lovely poem, Polly!
I am always amazed at how you can turn dorky prompts into something with depth!
Well done!
Thank you for your kind words about my SC-text. I thought this one was hard.
Best wishes,
Anna

P.S.
I love the name 'Daisy' too. (Read your comment to Cherie.) But I had to choose a name that rhymes with Daisy.

For the benefit of other readers:
Anna's SC week 42 Maisy-Jane

Tgoette said...

Polly, wonderful job with your Centus! That was such a beautiful and deep poem! Very touching!

cj Schlottman said...

Words like "Soundless shouts erupt from my heart" and "wandering through personal minefields" really ground this peace and make it real. Great Centus!

Namaste..........cj

cj Schlottman said...

PS Thanks for visiting and leaving your kind comment!

.........cj

Kat said...

"Wandering through personal minefields..." This was a beautiful take on the prompt. And the fact that you could write such a thought provoking piece from a silly song prompt speaks volumes about your writing ability. Bravo! Kat

Nancy Jane said...

Breathtaking, heart wrenching poem in less than 100? Priceless.

Karen S. said...

oh this is so good, we both went in kind of the same direction ..finally and I thought more would...but you really aced this one way better than I did! This is great!

Willoughby said...

Wonderful! I love it!

irishoma said...

Nice twist--and thought provoking.
Donna V.

nimaruichi said...

The reward lies in what comes after. Nice write.

Jenny said...

Polly. What beautiful, tragic and poignant writing.

I guess it's hard to understand why we often have to catch our own grenades. Why can't someone else just do it for us, and let us know when the explosion is finished?

You're amazing.

Jenny said...

Polly. What beautiful, tragic and poignant writing.

I guess it's hard to understand why we often have to catch our own grenades. Why can't someone else just do it for us, and let us know when the explosion is finished?

You're amazing.

Tina said...

what a sad story. i could feel your characters pain throughout.

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