Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear! Our beloved Ms. Jenny has decided that this was the week to test our lyric writing skills. She gave us the melody (Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star). She gave us the prompt: In the autumn. And she gave us the limitation of up to 32 words INCLUDING the prompt. At this, I take issue...I have always counted the prompt in every single centus limit Ms. Jenny has imposed and kept to the imposed word count exactly. In order to keep true with the notes and rhythm of "Twinkle", I had no choice but to cheat and use 34! Forgive me, Ms. Jenny!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(image courtesy of Total-Wallpapers.com and Google Images)
In the autumn’s cool, crisp air
Mums abloom with vibrant flair
Leaves hitch ride on fall’s brisk breeze
Bare are now embarrassed trees
Time has come for season’s change
Watch out turkeys! Shooting range!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fall is my favorite time of year. Time to break free those sweaters and boots from summer's hiding place. Long morning runs, in the cooler weather, with leaves crunching beneath the feet. Time for harvests and a myriad of fall festivals. And, of course, hunting season commences. It was tradition for my father, along with my brother, and my sister's husbands to go hunting at this time of year. Often times we'd feast on pheasant and quail, invariably biting into a wayward pellet or two. I do miss that (well except for the time my dad took me out hunting and suggested I be the "bird dog" and retrieve the "kill"...ewwww, ick!) Oh, the memories! Hee hee hee!
23 comments:
I might have known that with all your creative poetics, you would come up with something that is VERY GOOD!!
I LOVE the idea of embarrassed trees! Really love it!
There's a picture prompt here is you fancy!http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2011/09/12/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week-10/
Poor little bird dog! LOL!
Our guys are ramping up for turkey and deer, bow and gun. Since we live amidst terrorist deer, stalking unsuspecting vehicles on lone country roads, I've gotten over the sympathy for them. One year we got the "family discount" at the body shop. Fortunately I still had fur in the grill or the ins. company might have had issue with the claim.
The embarrassed trees line is great:@)
You never disappoint! Love this all to hell and back!
love turkey thoughts.
;)
Why can't I come up with stuff this good???:)~Ames
Very cute. I love it, especially the ending and "embarrassed trees." Great centus.
xoRobyn
This is a creative one. Good Centus.
=)
gobble gobble...ha...fun verse today 5th...autumn is my fav time of year too...and i love fall festivals...embarassed trees...smiles.
I love 'embarrassed trees':-)
Wonderful! I do like the crispness of autumn.
Erika
Artful Rising
I'm another one who loves 'embarrassed trees' ... brilliant!!!
I love fall too, the rustling leaves at night from my window, the big fall sweaters to keep warm, perfect season, not so for the birds, hearing gunshot from my window in the early mornings lately.
Excellent poem/lyrics and take on the prompt !
Well worth the 2 extra words !!!
oh, I loved it. Embarassed trees, watch out turkeys-shooting range! Great lyrics. laurie @ Battling My Inner Critic
Lovely words and they fit perfectly with the tune. I love, love fall. My favorite time of year. Good centus.
Polly, This is lively and fun. I love the bare, embarrassed tree! Thanks for comment on my "In The Ditch!"
Namaste..........cj
Dear Polly,
This is of course very, very good. You have captured the essence of Autumn, its flavour, its colours. And your original personifications ('embarrassed trees'), make this rise above the average.
It's singable too!
Excellent!
Best wishes,
Anna
Anna's SC wk 72'In the Autumn'
Poor little turkeys!! Good SC! =)
Nice, nice, nice...
jj
oh my. YOu did fabulous. And I actually counted the words in twinkle twinkle because I thought for sure Jenny was being mean. Besides, I think 2 words over is ok.
I loved this entire thing! Start to finish. Who care if you used an extra word or two! This was perfect...both to sing and to read!
You are amazing!
Post a Comment