Sunday, July 24, 2011

Saturday Centus: Too Late

Oh that Ms. Jenny! What a taskmaster she is. This week, rather than 100 words to work with, in addition to the prompt, she has only allowed us 15. Normally, I try to write my story in exactly the number of words she dictates but I could not this time. So I added my 15 word allotment prior to the prompt below (in green). 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Straining to be heard
over cacophony of alarms,
from monitors 
at her bedside,
she whispers:
“Before I die I want to….” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jenny Matlock

17 comments:

Cheryl said...

Yes, I am spending way too much time on this thing this morning!

This is terrific.

Alice Audrey said...

This has a lot of punch. We always are so sure we have more time, another chance, will be the exception.

- Alice

Brian Miller said...

i hope it is not too late for her to actualize...

moondustwriter said...

15 words - exceptional!

Deborah said...

I loved your take on this ... well done!!

Christine said...

Oh I hope that's not me one day.

Jo said...

oh you always craft something that makes me feel ...

Daydreamertoo said...

Awwww I hope she spoke her wishes

Ames said...

I want to quietly slip away in my own bed while sleeping. Not hooked up to a bunch of machines in some institution. Is that too much to ask God for?~Ames

jabblog said...

So sad - not the end any of us want, I'm sure.

Viki said...

So few words but much said. Good work.

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

That sure makes a person stop and think. Great job. laurie

gautami tripathy said...

Sad but so beautiful...


puerile ennui

Sean Vessey said...

Nice flip of the prompt. Simple but very effective...

cj Schlottman said...

Awe, Polly, this is so good. As a Hospice nurse, it touched me. Sometimes I wonder what our patients would say if we posed that question to them.

Namaste..........cj

Jenny said...

Polly. This was amazing. It makes me wish everyone had someone by their side to whisper their last wish to.

Gosh, that is a confusing sentence.

My eyes are too teary to write anymore, though.

Polly. You are my hero.

Nonna Beach said...

Excellent job !
Devastating yet so touching and beautiful !

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